Friday, January 29, 2016

Changeling, episode 4 recap

When we catch up with the gang again Amberle is being tested by the crazy tree, which will kill her and doom the world if she fails. #nopressure The tree blooms a single flower before spitting in Amberle's face. Nice. Amberle is transported to a wasteland full of corpses. (Note: Not eating dinner this time. #lessonlearned)
Dead Lorin is there, and he’s pissed, accusing Amberle of never loving him and having serious feels for Wil—before transforming into Dark Wil. We know he’s dark 'cause he has a man bun and everyone knows they’re evil. Wil taunts her, attacking until she stabs him a la Buffy.

Fake Wil says don’t let anything distract you—not fear, not love which is crappy. Love can empower people. But you can't argue philosophy with a tree. Then we get a crazy series of abstract flashes, and surprise! Eretria is in them too.

Scoring the weirdly-cyber-slash-steampunk looking seed, Amberle exits the tree (don’t ask) and shows everyone her spoils.
Apparently the tree is coming back part-Terminator.
Amberle gives Wil a weiiirrrddd look as she leaves the room and he’s like wth you were holding my hand minutes ago.
The demon in the palace reports telepathically to her master about Amberle and he’s all, who cares KILL HER ALREADY. She gets busted by an elf and slices him up in a fugly way. #swordthroughtheface
One of these elves is not like the other.
Amberle sketches the stain glass from her vision, and then Prince Douche takes a moment to diss Allanon with some anti-human paranoia. Everyone ignores him because he is a dick. Party-uncle says he knows a guy who knows beyond-the-border stuff. #hookedup

The king sends word to summon the descendant of Bear Grylls, and announces soldier Crispin will escort them to meet this dude because hello, we def need another young, good-looking elf. #whatiswiththisplace Meanwhile Allanon reminds everyone there is a traitor in the city.

Budding romance on the rocks, thanks to a TREE.
(There's a sentence you don't see every day.)
Amberle bails to avoid Wil, who is like girlfriend what is UP? She freaks and tells him she doesn’t need his emotions getting in the way of what they have to do. Ouch. #sickburn

Back to the rovers. (When will this storyline go away?). Eretria’s dad is making her sneak into the castle to get the stones, which is ridiculous. The elves aren't chill when it comes to security, but whatevs.

We cut to Amberle’s bestie—who doesn’t get enough screen time—and Amberle tells her some of what happened in the tree, omitting the Wil stuff. They're very touchy-feely. #elvesarehuggers 
On The 100 this scene would
probably have a very different ending.
Commander Tilton is called to the sanctuary and we all get to see the corpse again. #ickickyuck
Amberle's open-mouthed OMG face is better than Spencer,
Hanna, and Aria efforts... but Emily remains the Homecoming Queen of shock.
Cut to Bandon in the forest. Wil chats 'cause he’s a nice guy, but when he reaches for Bandon’s injured wrists the guy freaks, admitting he sees death when people touch him. Harsh.

Struck by inspiration, Wil shows him the sketch. Bandon says it's the room where Amberle and a human girl die. This is heavy, but I'm distracted by the elven version of public art in the background, and their love of open fire in flammable locations. 
Seriously, forests are not flame retardant.
Meanwhile Eretria breaks into the city, no probs. Am guessing the ridiculous amount of plants are to blame: they must need hella fresh air and sunlight. She follows Wil to his room, and yeah, still not a fan (sorry).
Aren't you a little short for a storm trooper?
Next up is a scene from an ugly family Christmas. Prince Loser loses his MIND when dad-king tells him he can’t have the throne. Another references to the supercool dead brother. Luckily, Party Uncle interrupts. (Awesome acting all-round.)

Eretria seduces Wil with this weird mix of truth and lies. I don’t think Eretria is sure if she’s lying or telling Will the truth—or if she intended to? #kidsgotissues

Amberle/Wil shippers were unhappy about this scene, but come on. Wil is an emotional mess: Amberle kicked him to the curb, his mum is dead, and he has no one and nothing (emotionally I mean) in the city. Sensing his vulnerability, Eretria exploits the opportunity. But it takes two to tango, and Farm Boy, you are sooo gonna regret this…
This image is here for extremely important plot-related
reasons that I'm sure I'll remember soon.
While Eretria and Will are busy gettin' busy, Allanon and Amberle argue about the demon in the city. Wil wakes up to a (not-at-all) shocking discovery: he got played and Eretria took the stones again. So stupid. And seriously hard to forgive. Like yeah, have sex, but don’t take your eyes off the ball, sorry, elf stones Wil! #tooeasy 

In one of my fave scenes of the episode, Bandon bumps into Amberlie's bestie Catania, and sees her death upstairs. She gets freaked and runs upstairs (not a good call), with Bandon chasing her.

Meanwhile Amberle spots Eretria, and chases her, but as the rover girl runs past a guard, the guard turns out to be the shadow demon shapeshifter who transforms into Eretria and tries to kill Amberle just as Catania comes around the corner (hence her murder that Bandon "saw"). 

Bandon jumps on the assassin and stops her, saving the actress who plays Catania from only appearing in flashbacks and visions for the rest of the series. #truehero
I don't think this is lens flare.
This is shot cool, with some slow-mo, and spinning,
and crashing, and edits from changing angles. #goteam
At the same time the real Eretria is making her escape only to be stopped by Amberle's uncle. After beating him up, she's knocked out by Commander Tilton. Eretria is dragged into the throne room and thanks to her less than sunny personality, manages to make friends with no one. 

They charge Eretria with murder, and rover girl's all W-T-F??  Wil enters to announce she stole the stones too. Before she's dragged away, Eretria tries to convince him she didn't attempt to murder anyone.

In a touching family moment, the king gives Amberle the sword her father used when he was alive and practices some positive reinforcement. #granddaddysgotyourback
While Amberle packs what I'm guessing is a never-ending array of battle-inappropriate corsets, Wil and Allanon discuss the fact Eretria might not be the murderer. Wil LIES, claiming Eretria attacked him. (Don't need to be a seer to know this is gonna come back and bite him.) 

Allanon points out eyes can be tricked. Wil warns Amberle she’s letting her hate for Eretria get in the way. (Also the look on Amberle's face whenever anyone mentions Eretria is priceless.)
We also score this great conversation...

Wil: If you have doubts that Eretria did it why didn’t you tell her?
Allanon: For the same reason you didn’t tell her you slept with the rover girl.

#salty Allanon confides in Wil that if the demon is in the palace and thinks their guard is down, it might try again. Wil says Bandon could help and Allanon realizes the kid is a seer. 

Cut to an elven coffin that I still think looks like a trendy coffee table. (Side note: Are they ever planning on burying these people?) Allanon tells Bandon he totes gets the seer thing, his mentor was one. Apparently it’s The Force all over again and involves “walking a perilous ledge between darkness and light”. He wants Bandon to check out Lorin's death.

Amberle becomes incredibly lame and insists the Chosen should be left in peace. Which is straight up ridiculous, considering the world is ending and Bandon’s not going to zombify them. #getittogethergirlfriend

The guy playing Lorin proves he could play a corpse on a procedural. We get to see a flashback seer vision to when demon-in-Amberle form killed Lorin and Allanon’s all sheeeet, it’s a changeling.
 Cut to the throne room (or exposition room, as we should start calling it). Wil suggests using Eretria as a decoy. Cold, man. #loverstiff

They visit her in the pretty elf prison, and Eretria is as friendly as ever. Amberle mentions the story about Wil being assaulted and Eretria goes for the throat, telling Amberle they slept together #biatch. At this point I kind of want the Changeling to eat her.
Next we see Eretria wandering through the castle pretending to be Amberle. While being all decoy-esque, she points out Amberle wasn't happy to hear about them. Wil rightly points out there is no us, and Eretria is cut, proving how emotionally dysfunctional this kid is. She slayed Wil, but then she robbed him AND ruined a friendship purely out of spite. #noseconddate

After claiming Wil seduced her (wtf) she lashes out with, Well I guess you’re really out of luck now. That princess won’t want a rover’s sloppy seconds. #thisgirlisawful
Commander Tilton saves us from the teen speak and hormone drama by revealing the body of a Black Watch guard has been found. Wil realizes the demon is in on the plan, and runs to tell Amberle.

Cut to Wil in the forest, and he runs inside yelling for the elf princess. She’s all, what’s the haps? Next his voice goes Darth Vader and he tries to kill her.

Allanon murders fake-Wil, and then real Wil rocks up and sees himself dead. #therapymuch Allanon tells them to burn the demon corpse and lock up the ashes.
Eretria tries to leave, and gets mad when Amberle's like, no way, back to prison for you. (I'm kind of with Amberle on this one.) 

Allanon intercedes, pointing out Eretria was in Amberle's vision. He says she needs to start trusting the Ellcrys, which considering the trees rep—NO WAY. 

Allanon follows up with the most non-logical line of the episode, making me wonder what he’s been smoking: if The Dagda Mor sends more demons we must be ready for them here. The entire time the demons have been after Amberle, and still are, so assuming they'll go to the elf palace instead of chasing her is weird. 
The back-up argument is Allanon wasn't in the vision. He can't go cause the tree says so. #pffft.

When Eretria asks, What the hell is the Ellcrys? (Girl, you do NOT wanna know), Amberle responds with, loverboy can fill you in proving this roadtrip is gonna suck.

Oh look, Daddy Dearest is watching Rover Girl from the trees. That's not creepy af. 
And finally, the Changeling rises up from his unlit pyre and kills the elven guard, proving you should never trust the advice of a druid who's had too much Ellcrys bark. #justsayin

That was fun. Till next time xx

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